140822

Joke of the Day

"The wife told her husband ""look at your neighbour everyday he kisses his wife before going to work, why don't you do the same ?"", he says "" I would, but would she accept ?"""

Next Joke
 
"Watching my mom use an iPhone is like watching a 12 year old girl try and contact her dead grandma on a Ouija board."
"*feels painful possible cavity* *eats chocolate to feel better*"
"Sitting around the outdoor campfire I chuckle to myself My friend asks, what's so funny? I reply, ""I can't tell you out here, it's an inside joke."""
"What is worse than a dog howling at the moon? Two dogs howling at the moon."
"How Do You Get Stoned in Ancient Rome? Start shouting Jehovah."
"where does noah keep his bees? in the ark hives."
"84% of Canadians think the preparations for the American blizzard are ""cute"""
"The average speed of ejaculation is 28 mph. Which, unfortunately, makes it illegal to ejaculate in a school zone when children are present."
"What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic-sport-centered-around-rednecks (I heard this forever ago and wanted to share. Sorry if it happens to be a repost.)"