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Joke of the Day

"What's your favorite thing about earth? It's just got such a great atmosphere."

"What did the Jamaican priest call the guy who was arrested for sealing several tonnes of spices? A cinna-mon"

"Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue."

"To whoever has my old phone number: I truly hope you're enjoying those texts from that guy I met at that thing"

"That moment when you laugh so much about your friends joke you end up farting accidently."

"*runs thru a couple holding hands like it's the finish line of a marathon."

"Words (short and lame) Prepositions are words to not end sentences with."

"When I was a kid, I played football with a broken nose for an entire season... We couldn't afford a football."

"The black smoke coming from my toaster indicates a new pop tart has been selected!"

"COP: Know why I stopped you? ""Drag racing?"" COP: Nope. ""Speeding?"" COP: Definitely not. ""Cuz I'm on a unicycle?"" COP: That's the one."