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Joke of the Day

"I was having a look... In my mothers bedroom the other day and I found a whip, a mask and handcuffs in her wardrobe. I couldn't believe it... My mothers a superhero!!!!!"

"Walmart greeter smiled at me. Long story short, the weddings Friday. Everyone's invited. Except Harold. HE said I'd NEVER find true love."

"What do you call a stupid asshole? Ignoranus"

"My girlfriend told me I need to spice things up in the bedroom... So I told her I would cumin her pussy. (That joke only works sometimes because it's seasonal)"

"TIFU by telling a terrorist joke to my Muslim girlfriend. She blew up in my face."

"How to be a good person: 1. Listen to everything they say on Fox News. 2. Do the exact opposite."

"Why did the chord get kicked out of the bar? Because he was Aminor"

"When I'm away from my girlfriend, I feel incomplete... ... But I love it when we're together again, because she makes me feel hole."

"What drink does hitler hate the most? Juice"

"Why was Hitler diagnosed with blindness? Because he could nazi anyone."