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Joke of the Day

"What fish do road-menders use ? Pneumatic krill !"

"There's no time like the present. Or later. Later on is pretty similar, actually."

"How did the hipster burn his tongue? He ate pizza before it was cool."

"A gross joke which is better to listen to, than to read. - What is the difference between diarrhea and a regular stool? You can't [gbrblblblbl](gargling noise) with a regular stool."

"I spent two hours child-proofing my home. They still got in."

"Why is it better to be a hooker than a drug dealer? Because you can sell the same crack over and over again."

"CHIPOTLE MANAGER: we can't figure out why these e.coli outbreaks keep happening ME: [bathing in a tub of salsa in the back] ya very weird"

"The ""PB&HJ;"" looked better on the menu. They really do have everything at the Cheesecake Factory."

"What goes ""knio knio?"" A backward pig."

"What do you call a Mexican who can see into the future? Cristobal"