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Joke of the Day

"Girl are you a plumber? Cause i wanna make you moen"

"Why was math so easy in ancient Rome? x always equals 10"

"Whats the problem with feminist picnics ? None of them make the sandwiches."

"My girlfriend said she's disgusted that I pick my nose so much. I just blew it, didn't I?"

"What do you get when you plant a loaf of bread? A bakery."

"[inventing dialup internet] What should it sound like when it's connecting? [guy in the back stands up confidently] Pterodactyls"

"Women treat me like God. They only talk to me when they need something."

"I'm totally hooked on masturbation! It's a dick thing.."

"I'm no cactus expert. But, I know a prick when I see one."

"I got 99 problems, and I wish a bitch was one, because then that means I interacted with a girl and can brag about it to my stuffed animals."