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Joke of the Day

"????LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR ????LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR ????LET THE BODIES HIT THE- ""Carl, you're fired. You're a horrible mortician."""

"Yo momma's so fat... ...she sat on a quarter and squeezed a booger out of George Washington's nose!"

"Never test the depth of the water with both feet."

"If a mathematician were to be any part of a kitchen which would he be? The counter."

"A little poetry never killed anybody. But haiku keeps trying."

"When I grow up I want to be a fire truck... I want to be big, red and have 8 men in me at once"

"So, my wife makes moonshine.... ...but I love her still."

"I often worry about the safety of my children ... Especially the one who is still awake at midnight and talking back right now."

"My grandpa always told me to watch my health, not my money.. ... one day as I was taking a walk, watching my health, someone stole my wallet. It was my grandpa."

"Waitress dad jokes When waitress comes to the table ask if she takes orders ,""to go""? If she says yes respond with, ""Great! Get your purse we're leaving."""