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Joke of the Day

"OMG, he's almost here. How's my hair? My clothes? How do I look? (knock, knock) He's here!!!! I'm so excited! *My pizza delivery guy."

"Q: How so you call a member of the finacial staff of the faculty of Biology? A: A Buy-ologist."

"Do you know what a girl says when she sees a big...NSFW Do you know what a girl says when she sees a big dick? *when the person says: 'no what'* I do"

"GF: ""I'm telling you now! Size does not matter, it doesn't make you any less important."" BF: ""Yeah? Well explain that to Pluto."""

"What do a Total Bitch and her Tampon have in common? NSFW They're both Stuck-up Cunts."

"Knock, Knock. Who's there? To To Who? Um, it's 'to whom'."

"Knock-knock Who's there? Dave. Dave's not here, man..."

"I'm smiling. This should scare you."

"What do you do with an aggressive Islamic German shepherd Muslim"

"Why did we skip windows 9? Because 7 8 9 I'm so sorry"