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Joke of the Day
"I used an emoticon with a nose once. It was stupid and embarrassing. I wouldn't recommend it."
Next Joke
"Why is the archaeologist depressed? Some old stuff just got dug up"
"I got into a car accident with a midget... He got out of his car, angrily shaking his fist and yelled, ""I'm NOT happy!"" ""Well,"" I replied, ""which one are you?"""
"What do you call the mineral found in teeth and tooth enamel? Apatite."
"What do you call a pc that fell in the ocean? A Dell rolling in the deep."
"What's the difference between Elliot Rodger and an egg? [x-post from r/4Chan] An egg gets laid before it cracks. [Source:](http://i.imgur.com/L4kXpw8.jpg)"
"My poetry brings all the hipsters to the yard and they're like ""How Avant-garde"""
"What do you call a line of men waiting to get a hair cut? A barbecue"
"*Full parking lot* Me: IF THERE IS A GOD, FIND ME A SPOT AND I WILL BECOME RELIGIOUS! *spot opens up* Me: NEVER MIND, I FOUND ONE!"
"During my prostate exam I asked the doctor, ""where should I put my pants?"" ""Over there by mine"" was not the answer I was expecting."