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Joke of the Day

"A mosquito fell into my beer five minutes ago and now he's naked and calling his ex-girlfriends and drinking my beer"

"My favourite jokes are one liners about launderettes What can I say, I love dry clean humour."

"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants. One's a crusty bus station while the other's a busty crustacean."

"""Newt Gingrich"" sounds like the name of a villain that JK Rowling made up."

"You can say what you like about deaf people. As long as you are not directly facing them."

"So this guy with premature ejaculation... ...just comes out of no where!"

"What is the key to being a successful and lucrative locksmith? There isn't one."

"What did fish say when she hit the wall ? Dam(n) !!!"

"Putin takes over entire world while everybody searches for the missing plane."

"Q: Did you hear about the Polak who thought his wife was trying to kill him? A: On her dressing table he found a bottle of ""Polish Remover""."