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Joke of the Day

"That whole ""letting go"" of your ex is always more satisfying when they're dangling over an abyss."

"Whenever there's an awkward silence, try whispering, ""Did you forget your line?"""

"What did the hungry dyslexic order at the movie theater? Cop porn * This is probably already a joke but I'm experiencing a huge coffee crash so it was hilarious to me."

"I don't know why people say food in the military is bad... I was given a big chicken dinner!"

"How do you get a homosexual man to have sex with a heterosexual woman? Shit in her cunt. (its just a joke people)"

"Did you hear about the murder of the door maker? The police said it was an open and shut case."

"Got the dermatologist recommended detergent and dryer sheets and I'm pretty sure it would've been cheaper to just buy a whole new body."

"Girls are a lot like universities... I spend hours looking at them, only to realise I can't get into any of them."

"""Poop"" is quite possibly the shittiest palindrome in the whole English language."

"Being a procrastinator with OCD means that I do nothing over and over and over again."