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Joke of the Day

"The first judge ever was like ""When I'm done talking I'll pound my desk with a hammer"" and we were all ""Ok that's not insane"""

"lets play cops & robbers! ok! i'll be robber! i'll be cop! *robber hides* *cop just starts wrestling all the black kids in the neigborhood*"

"How many dancers does it take to change a lightbulb? 5,6,7,8"

"My ring tone is a woman faintly screaming Help me, Superman. Help me!' and then I run away, unexplained."

"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Don't be stupid, feminists can't change anything!"

"I'm getting restraining orders against all the cops so I can do anything I want"

"Johnny Bravo would be so perfect for Jersey shore."

"Sometimes I like to pet another dog while making eye contact with my dog. Adds just the right amount of tension to our relationship."

"My rum-raisin cake is gluten free. It's also raisin free. And cake free. OK it's just rum."

"Trump's gonna be sooo mad when he finds out that China realized building a Great Wall didn't keep foreigners out 400 years before he did."