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Joke of the Day

"Seeing as it's almost time for New Years Celebrations for myself Tonight I am an exorcist, as I shall be ridding the house of all Spirits."

"It's 450 BC. Socrates is doing a keg stand at a philosopher frat party. Gets the nickname SoCRAYtes. Nobody takes him seriously ever again."

"Why kind of cigarettes do Hawaiians smoke? Mahalo bro lights."

"What's the best remedy for a sex starved drug addict? A jack and coke."

"bill nye is short for william new years eve"

"When picking partners for a trust fall . . . . . . Always choose the ground. The ground will always catch you."

"Anyone else ever wondered how long it would take a giraffe to throw up ?"

"""Down"" ""Penetration"" ""Tight End"" ""Ball handling"" Don't the networks have censors any more?"

"My Grandmother always leaves long voicemails. Its 5 minutes of her talking and 10 minutes of her trying to hang up the phone."

"What is better to be taken, than to be given? A shit"