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Joke of the Day

"The past, present, and future walk into a bar... ...it was tense."

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"The say the job market isn't good for an English Major... ...but hey, at least you're still higher than a captain."
"I've learnt a lot from the movies over the years, such as how to count using Roman numerals... I, II, III, IV, V, Balboa."
"The waiting list for the WiiU.... Just got shorter in Conneticut"
"Why is it called stand-up comedy? Because people in wheelchairs shouldn't be laughed at."
"I discovered that Germans invented cunnilingus... Apparantly they've been yodeling in the black forest for centuries."
"Every time I think I've got the perfect family they escape."
"How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb? None. They have to get the guitarist to do it for them."
"Confucius say....... ........woman who fly in plane upside down, crack up."
"What is big hairy and can fly faster than sound? King Koncord."