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Joke of the Day

"There's a new movie coming out about people who take a long time to orgasm... It hasn't released yet."

"What should you buy if your hair falls out ? A good vacuum cleaner !"

"Menstruation is no laughing matter Menstration is no launghing matter. Period."

"No thanks, flu shot. I look forward to three days off from work and returning looking like I was on a diet for six weeks."

"I've just ordered a procrastinating blowup doll with real orgasm effect It's coming tomorrow"

"just got my deaf friend drunk and he's slurring fingers so bad right now"

"If your uncle jack helped you off a horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse?"

"Why do cows lie down in the rain? To keep each udder dry."

"How much does a hipster weigh? One instagram."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I've never had a garbanzo bean on my chest"