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Joke of the Day
"Are trees really necessary? They seem kind of arbor-trary."
Next Joke
"It's funny how you think it's your cat leaving all those dead birds on your doorstep."
"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! Sorry if repost"
"A Chemistry Degree is like an awesome girlfriend, because you get anal before getting physical."
"Me: check out this new gadget. It carbonates anything! Friend: cool Me: yeah even blood Friend: um I gotta go Me: lol no you're staying"
"What do you call a rapper who's feeling bitter? NaClmore"
"[At bar] BARTENDER: I dont think she wants to talk man ME: [dabbing on pickle juice as cologne] I think I know what the ladies want pal"
"What two words would passengers never want to hear a pilot say? Allahu akbar"
"I once watched two guys arguing in sign language. Either that, or they were both really bad at martial arts."
"Where did the King keep his armies? In his sleevies!"