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Joke of the Day

"A Mother is cleaning her kids room... She finds a bunch of BDSM gear and fetish mags. She shows her husband Mom: What do we do? Dad: I'm not sure, but whatever you do you better not spank him!!"

"my dream job is to be the FBI guy who nicknames criminals. someone blew up a fish market? Tunabomber. easy."

"I put a picture of my friend with MS on my computer. It quit running"

"Donald Trump's Executive Plan for the next 4 years. 1. Make America Great Again 2. ? 3. Profit"

"Two nuns are having a bath one turns to the other and asks ""Where's the soap?"" ""Yes, it does."" she replies."

"I asked my doctor how bad my breath is. ""You see that broccoli over there?"" he pointed. ""Yes..."" I replied. ""That was a cauliflower before you started talking."""

"Universe's odds of existing? Near impossible. Humanity's odds of existing? Near impossible. My chances at a relationship? Well... I make the other odds look like a 1 in 6 roll on loaded dice."

"I just took an IQ test and apparently I'm a Libra?"

"Did you hear Rick Ross's new song about the Ebola crisis? It's called 100 Blacks Coughin'"

"I know how to get on a flight. Thank you boarding school."