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Joke of the Day
"How many mexicans? how many mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Juan."
Next Joke
"[end of the night]*hand running through her hair, pulls out a lizard* ME: no not again *she unzips jacket, collapses into a pile of lizards*"
"Whatever Mom, IF THAT'S EVEN YOUR REAL NAME!!!"
"You should have seen the guy who unlocked the liquor store this morning. It was like he never saw anyone roll up a sleeping bag before."
"If anyone needs an ark, I Noah guy."
"Drugs and alcohol aren't the answer. Unless the question is why did you shit on the sidewalk last night?"
"Why didn't Barbie get pregnant? Because Ken 'came' in another box!"
"What's your favorite thing about earth? It's just got such a great atmosphere."
"So, what's the suspension like on one of these? Does it have good road handling? What's the spring rate? ~ me, bra shopping"
"What do you call a water bottle that objects? A rebuttle"