135763
Joke of the Day
"[Confessional Booth] Me: I can't do anything right. Priest: Please get off of my lap."
Next Joke
"I told my wife I want to try anal sex... She said she's been having anal sex for years. My entire life is the joke."
"I figured it out. Renee Zellweger is stuck in the longest oncoming sneeze of all time."
"""A ghost took a dump all over the house!!!"" - Paranormal Activia"
"Doctor Doctor I think I'm a moth. So why did you come around then ? Well I saw this light at the window...!"
"Auto correct doesn't work when I use caps lock. My phone is like ""woah, better let this dude cool down before I tell him he's wrong"""
"What is the difference between my grandma and a newborn baby? When I fuck my grandma up the ass she doesn't die."
"Germanwings 'Knock Knock' joke. *Knock Knock* Who's there? *A Germanwings pilot* A Germanwings pilot who? **LUBITZ, LET ME IN GODDAMNIT, YOU'RE GONNA CRASH THE PLANE!!**"
"Can't get a woman? Rip out your rib and make your own! Critics are raving ""this doesn't work"" and ""I'm bleeding to death""."
"How much is appropriate to tip the police officer who opens the squad car door for you?"