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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend hates my new cologne chloroform... She says it makes her drowsy and gives her a sore ass"

"[dinner w/friends] ""How long you two been married?"" It's been thirt- (wife shaking head) teenish twenty- (still shaking) for a long time."

"What do a pizza and this joke have in common? They're both cheesy."

"How can you tell this joke was submitted by a woman? No, wait."

"It takes a keen ear to pick out a girl's ""I haven't finished but I know you're about to, so I'll try to be supportive"" moan."

"I'm not a discriminatory person, and I'll say it again : It doesn't matter for me if you're gay, bi, trans, black or normal."

"Son: Mom, why are you always showing up at my school on chicken nugget day? Me: *literally salivating* Here to see you, buddy."

"What was the pedophile doing on the beach? Just kidding"

"We're having sweet potato fries with dinner ""Haha sweet potatoes?"" DON'T ""Don't what?"" You're gonna make a dumb potato pun ""I YAM NOT!"""

"Why did the imgurian cross the road? To get the meme on the other side"