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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a cow and 911? You stop milking a cow after 14 years.."

"60 Second Lover I think my girlfriend has fucked sixty one people before me. She calls me her sixty second lover ...."

"What's the difference between a women's track team and a tribe of pygmies? He tribe of pygmies is a cunning bunch of runts."

"Where is the worst place to hide in a hospital? In the ICU."

"If you want to go running with me, you'd better be prepared to walk a lot."

"What do you call a slice of bread from another country? An immigraint."

"Id like to thank /r/nsfw for getting me through hard times."

"Whenever you floss, you should be allowed to go to your dentist's house and collect an allowance."

"I hate hipsters Their vegan diets, whiskery faces, tiny feet, and sawdust bedding. Oh wait, hamsters, I hate hamsters"

"How do you insult a Catholic? Any way you like, they have to forgive you!"