135333

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the circus performance gone wrong? The lion tamer was mauled, it was in tents."

"This hating of people who breast feed in public places has to stop! I'll raise my dog however I like."

"Toy Story (1995): A young boy's toy chest becomes possessed by haunted dolls, forcing the family to move away. But the dolls find him."

"Listen mate, the only rapture I'm interested in was sung by Debbie Harry"

"Obama is a lot like college Everyone wants four more years, but nobody wants to pay for it."

"It would be terrifying if Elizabeth I were alive today... ... Because she's dead. Note: Credit goes to my dryly-sarcastic history professor."

"Ever hear about the Roman general who had a fit every time there was cold weather? Hail.. seizure"

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent."

"Its ridiculous that Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his anger issues and not for his amazing & realistic paintings of fake tunnels."

"Caller: Is Mr. Rock available? Me: Yeah, hold on. *hands phone to 5yo* Me: It's grandma, buddy. Tell her about Caillou."