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Joke of the Day

"The guy who made my sandwiches told me Have Fun as he handed them to me. Not sure what he thinks I was gonna do wit them"

"[DIY] How to turn your dishwasher into a snowblower Buy the bitch a shovel"

"A man suffering Crohns Disease who speaks to the deceased is currently fornicating with his obese wife. he's a small medium in large."

"Stand Up Comedy Yes, I actually did some stand up comedy, but I didn't like it... every time I would get up on stage to do my routine, all people ever did was laugh at me..."

"Someone told me I have no sense of humor I don't get it"

"What's the difference between a dim monster and a birthday candle? The candle is a thousand times brighter!"

"I wonder be sad when Gabe Newell dies. He'll rise from the dead in three days."

"*i finally get a girl over* *dad rolls out from under my bed* YO SON WHATA YA CALL A PIG WHO DOES KARATE? ""dad no"" A PORK CHOP"

"How many debutants can you fit in ballroom at the Waldorf Astoria? [OC] Like, a cotillion of 'em."

"What is a small, one story home made of poop called? A dungalow"