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Joke of the Day

"What do gay horses eat? Horse penis"

"My housemates may get angry at me for stealing all their cooking utensils.. ..but quite frankly that's a whisk I'm willing to take."

"Hey guys I just discovered something... It's called Christopher Columbus. I later robbed and killed him."

"It's fine if you wanna shoot a buncha folks as long as you start with yourself. That's my only rule about it."

"I just saw an old guy pick a rubber glove out of a garbage can and put it on, and I think he might be missing the point of rubber gloves."

"The virgin I like my men like I like my sci-fi movies... to boldly go where no man has gone before!"

"What do you call your friend from Prague who beat you at chess? Your Czech mate"

"Lame joke I made one night. What do you get when you mix a cat and a blender? A visit from the cops."

"Why don't we see more midget actors? I guess you can say that they are in short supply these days."

"Depressed? Just imagine Ozzy Osbourne struggling to pour a giant jar of change into a Coinstar."