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Joke of the Day

"Went off roading with my prius but ended up getting stuck on a bonsai tree in neighbor's front yard"

"A horse walks into a bar The bartender asks, ""why the long face?"" The horse starts crying. In between the sobs, he says ""it's not my fault I look like Sarah Jessica Parker!"""

"I went to a child psychologist once. He was rubbish. He was only seven."

"1.Open Facebook 2.Search for a pic with 4 girls 3.Coment: ""You 3 look so pretty!"" 4.Enjoy"

"Sexy is when a woman is hot enough to flaunt it but chooses not to."

"My date said he wasn't looking for anything serious like I was trying to help him solve cold case files and shit."

"What was the last thing that went through the hostages head? A bullet."

"""Your honor, my client is absolutely not a flight risk.""n""What makes you so sure?""n""He is a penguin."""

"A BJ a days keep the sluts away from my man..."

"Hats off to those people brave enough to wear those silly New Years hats at work. No... I meant take your hats off. You look stupid."