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Joke of the Day

"All-Girls High School ""The number one most commonly used phrase in any all-girls high school is 'behind my back!' The second most common is 'right to my face!'"" - Celia Pacquola"

"If athletes get athlete's foot then what do astronauts get? Missile toe."

"A Jewish kid wants to go to the mall... and asks his dad for forty dollars. ""Thirty dollars?"" he replies. ""What do you need twenty dollars for?"""

"How did the geometry teach kill himself? He used a hypote-""noose"""

"My wife is like a new credit card. 0% interest for 12 months."

"WHAT DO WE WANT?! A CURE FOR TOURETTE'S! WHEN DO WE WANT IT?! CUNT!"

"""How much would you say you read the Bible?"" ""Well, I don't read it religiously."" Bud-dum tss, I hate myself."

"What did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog? Hey! We really DO taste like chicken!"

"Something you may have in your house right now could be killing your children. We'll tell you about it in 2 days. - Local News"

"Just told a shop owner that the customer is always wrong. When she tried to correct me, she exploded."