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Joke of the Day

"i was going to get married, but my wife refuses to sign the divorce papers"

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"Never trust a big butt and a smile. Where is the rest of this woman's body?"
"Give me a compliment. A woman looks into the mirror and says to her husband: ""I feel fat, old and ugly, give me a compliment"". The man replies: ""Your eyes are still working great""."
"i take valium & viagra so if i dont get a fuck i dont give a fuck"
"TIL: Studies have shown that people who annually experiance more birthdays tend to live longer. 'The more you know'"
"Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore... A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband."
"I got asked how I view lesbian relationships.. Apparently HD wasn't the correct answer."
"A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""I'll serve You, but don't start anything."""
"Why was Disney's massage parlor so successful? Everybody gets a happy ending."
"When I figured out that people walk on hardwood and carpet, I was floored."