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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a boy scout and a Jew ? A boy scout returns back from camp."

"Well, that's the last time I tell my girlfriend to sit on my face... whilst doing a Sean Connery impersonation."

"I tried a new fragrance today. It's called Tester."

"Don't you just hate those guys who show up at your door and tell you that you need to be saved or you'll burn? Fucking firemen."

"Me: Table for four, please. And can we get some crayons? Her: Will there be children dining today? Me: No. The crayons are for me."

"Drying out wet fireworks in the oven is not a good idea. Trust me on this"

"Laundry Day Me: Tell me about this lipstick on your shirt. Him: Babe, I can explain! Me: Don't care. Just ask her the brand and shade name."

"Blind date I went on a blind date with this girl to a bar and as soon as I saw her I knew what I was going to drink. She ordered juice, I ordered coffee to go."

"guy walks into a bar with a .44 magnum and yells ""who the fuck fucked my wife!"". Everybody's silent for a second, then a guy in the back of the bar says ""you haven't got enough bullets mate"""

"What did the college student say to a banker? I am forever in your debt."