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Joke of the Day

"Hi, I'm hosting a party with dinner & drinks on Friday 14th Feb for people who struggle to reach orgasm. If you can't cum let me know."

"Why does superman have balls of steel? I wouldn't know, i don't know the canon that well"

"My friend asked why I have a folder named ""dick pics"" I told him because nobody will open it and find my porn."

"Why did the dog's friends send her home from the bar when she started to act strange? They thought she might have been slipped a woofie."

"Sleep is like sex, you never get enough of it and sometimes it feels like it never happened at all."

"Q: What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? A: Virgin Mobile"

"Had to get up at 8 o'clock to work. That's 8 in the MORNING. Like a fucking farmer or something."

"I was late to a meeting traveling to West Virginia. I forgot to reset my watch to the mid 1800s."

"COP: Nobody on the main floor. Let's check upsta-- GIRAFFE COP: Nobody upstairs"

"I'm in Germany. Time to drink precisely one bier (beer) and call every man ""Hans"""