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Joke of the Day

"Nothing beats a good math joke My penis is like an asymptote. It goes on forever but nothing ever touches it."

"I never understood movie scenes where they have to train assassins. just drop me in some hot climate, don't feed me and I'll kill everyone."

"A haunted house would be pretty scary if it was filled with light switches that accidentally turned on the garbage disposal."

"Did you know that Native Americans were really good strippers? Every time they danced, they made it rain."

"Putin and Medvedev go to a hooker. The hooker is sucking Putin off and Medvedev is fucking her from behind. Medvedev: Should we swap? Putin: Sure, you can swap."

"Why did the Chemistry Teacher go to Jail? He got caught giving alcohol to minors."

"Why did the poor dog chase his tail? Because he was trying to make both ends meet."

"Why did the foreigner vote for Trump? He heard he would get to watch the inauguration on a plane"

"Fox News: Witnesses are telling us Michael Brown may have charged Officer Darren Wilson atop a dragon, wielding a poison-tipped broadsword"

"Why did the chicken get into so much trouble? Because of its fowl language."