133600

Joke of the Day

"Blonde joke ""Nurse, could you please take Mr. Oliver's pulse?"" ""Why? Doesn't he have one of his own?"""

"I've started a new religion based on the consumption of high-percentage alcohol. Its only downside is that I now miss a lot of work due to hangovers It's called absinthe-theism."

"Did you hear about the hipster with heatstroke? He got it before it was cool."

"Cop: we know you're in there. Me in a French accent: I am not ere, I am in France. Cop: when will you be back? Me: je ne comprends pas"

"So...the past, the present, and the future walked into a bar. It was tense."

"What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A tyrano-snore-us rex."

"How does a pirate tip his hat? ""M'Hearty"""

"I've heard seven cancer jokes today... If I hear tumor, it's gonna benign."

"""I drive like lightening."" ""You drive fast?"" ""No. I hit trees."""

"Nothing is better than studying That's why i do nothing."