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Joke of the Day

"what do you call a deer with no eyes? 'No idea.....' 'What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?' 'Still no idea.......' My all time favourites :)"

"My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the individual behind the counter for ""minimal lettuce."" He said he was sorry but they only had iceberg."

"Why did the crematorium operator get a $500 bonus? Because he'd urn-ed it."

"Just saw a five year old in a track suit & a gold chain. His nana didn't think it was funny when I asked him if he could hook up some blow."

"Another normal evening Cook food - 30 minutes Eat it - 5 minutes Check Facebook - 1 minute Check Twitter - 8 hours"

"Officer: You were speeding. Me: I am trying to keep up with traffic. O: There Is no traffic. M: I am really far behind."

"Guy at door: How would you like to make a donation to our local orphanage? Dad: yea sure [yells up to me] son, you live with this guy now!"

"What did the caterpillar say to the cocoon after he broke out? Moth."

"The ACLU has informed me that Mother's Day is too inclusive. So Happy Everyone Gay Pride AIDS Awareness Aboriginal Illegitimate Child Day!"

"What's Shaking? Not Ali...."