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Joke of the Day

"Eschew pretentious poses. The boy who farted laughing gas, eschewed pretentious poses. He thought those who called him vulgar, had boogers in their noses."

"George Bush was trying out BDSM with his wife. George: Punish me baby, I've been a bad boy. Laura: Hmmm...what did you do honey? George: 9/11"

"My N'Sync tattoo? I got it to remind me not to make impulsive decisions based on fleeting trends that I'd regret for the rest of my life."

"Knock knock -Knock knock. -Who's there? -Athens. -Oh no, it's the polis!"

"I guess my parents were secret agents all along. I heard they're getting a divorce because my dad got blown by the mailman."

"Why was the Baker a part-time drug dealer? Because he really kneaded the dough. (please forgive me for that awful pun)"

"Why do the French like Easter? Because it's such a bonne idee."

"""But I can't conquer China, it's way too big..."" Now Genghis, what do I always say? *Sighs* ""I'm Genghis Khan, not Genghis Khan't"""

"I can't believe my neighbors came to my house at 5:00 AM... ...thank god I was already up playing the bagpipes."

"When is it ok to snipe police officers? As Dallast resort."