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Joke of the Day

"What does ADA stand for? Dyslexic Association of America"

"PE Teacher: Why did you kick that ball straight at the school computer? Pupil: You told me to put it in the Net."

"[at divorce lawyer] bad news, currently all your husbands assets are frozen ""he didn't"" he bought 1547 copies of it, he must really hate you"

"Great wine is like great jazz... It confuses me and I'm pretty sure it's all the same. EDIT: Front page? Hot damn! Now what do I do with my life?"

"I like sleeping with amish women that way i don't have to call the next day"

"Finding Nemo. Grilling Nemo. Eating Nemo."

"Coors Light ships cold straight from the factory. I wish other water companies would do the same."

"Why couldn't the physicist understand how boats work? He thought nothing could possibly travel faster than sea."

"So what do you do for a living? ""I'm in the Secret Service"" Wow, you didn't keep that secret too well did you"

"What do you call a cow with one udder? A bull."