14113

Joke of the Day

"Two Congressmen are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, ""Pass the soap."" The second one says, ""No SOPA, radio!"""

"Of course Jesus saves. He's Jewish."

"How does a witch tell time? With a witchwatch."

"Why are homosexuals always happy? Cause they're gay (happy)."

"He insulted my sister, and I let it slide. He insulted my mother, and I let it slide. Then...he insulted my tweets."

"Sometimes I really think about killing myself. I don't. But I *really* think about it."

"What is a bee's favourite classical music composer ? Bee-thoven !"

"The detective knew exactly what the murder weapon was. It was a brief case."

"I just ate wood chips covered in lead-based paint... Hopefully I'll ""number 2"" a pencil."

"When I'm out with my kids and I see an x-boyfriend I like to scare him by saying ""Don't make eye contact with daddy."""