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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't the accountant keep his car in working order? Because it broke down and he couldn't budget."

"Whats the last thing you want to hear before you go to sleep? Zippity Bop, Puddin' pop!"

"This 5p bag tax is great I can get a 10bag for 50p"

"What is Snoop Dogg's favorite restaurant? Sizzle-r"

"What's a Scientologist's favourite piece of furniture in Rivendell? Elrond's cupboard."

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I've never paid $40 to watch a garbanzo bean.."

"I like making silly faces in group photos because it's better to look ugly on purpose"

"What is more funny than a penguin sliding down a hill? The penguin who pushed him!"

"Difference between an android and an iphone. *iphone falls to the floor* Breaks screen. *android falls to the floor* Breaks floor."

"Afghanistan is just a regular ghanistan that's ghanistan af."