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Joke of the Day

"What do you call two jalapenos getting it on? Fucking hot!"

"I have an inferiority complex ....But it's not a very good one. :("

"They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks... But I didn't even try and mine's been playing dead for an hour!"

"Do you remember that barbeque you had? The one where I had my meat all up on your grill?!?!?!"

"I once went to an open air Queen concert. It was good, but there was a terrible electrical storm during the set Thunderbolts and lightning, very very frightening..."

"What do women and condoms have in common? They spend more time in your wallet than on your dick."

"no matter what the government says no one can stop you from eating the bugs you find in your garden"

"As soon as I can go a full year without losing a pair of sunglasses, then maybe I'll be ready to take care of a kid."

"Say what you will against pedophiles, but at least... they drive slowly in school zones."

"When I say I'm as sober as a judge I mean Paula Abdul."