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Joke of the Day
"Masturbation comes in handy. Literally"
Next Joke
"What do you call a fat female assassin? A killer whale."
"So I saw a black guy running down the street with a TV I then shouted, ""Hey that is mine!"" but I then realised that mine was at home polishing my shoes"
"A Muslim, an idiot, and a communist walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""Hello Mr.President."""
"[pirate ship] Pirate: Walk the plank Me: *struts down like nobody's business* Pirate: wait come back that was awesome you're one of us now"
"Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means you laugh at his."
"""Mom, what does married mean?"" Taking naps together ""Daddy naps with his secretary are they married?"" No, that means he's getting divorced"
"What's the difference between a frog and a horny toad? The frog goes ""Ribbit ribbit"" and the horny toad goes ""rub it rub it."""
"When a guy tries to talk to me while at a urinal I instantly slide over and start pissing in his urinal too. See how friendly he really is"
"How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Not sure, first they have to figure out which way to spin it."