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Joke of the Day

"*tree falls in forest, quickly stands up and looks around to see if anybody heard it, brushes self off*"

"Horny rooster What does a normal rooster say? cock-a-doodle-doo! what does a horny rooster say? any-cock-will-do!"

"I'm sorry I ran over your dog but in my defense I was texting! You're being awfully judgemental for someone who can't even see."

"Final words to David before surgery: ""If I don't make it? Swear you'll have me cremated & snort my ashes off a hooker's ass."" He promised."

"The ultimate masochist The submissive: Hit me!!! The masochist: No..."

"What do you call a fuzzy animal that grows on trees? A root bear! (I came up with this joke a few minutes ago. I hope it's funny)"

"How many angels can dance on the head of a pin? Depends on what tune the Devil happens to be playing. Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha."

"The inventor of the air conditioner has died. Thousands of fans attended his funeral."

"Cher puts out an album only covering Meatloaf. Title: Cher the Meatloaf"

"When I fall down a public venue, ""Did anyone see me"" totally outranks ""Am I ok"" on the thought process."