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Joke of the Day

"What time does Sean Connery arrive at Wimbledon? Tennish"

"A mosquito bit Hillary Clinton the other day... It was later found to have hit itself in the back of the head with a fly swatter."

"I have a joke that will make you look stupid. Oh. I see you have already heard it."

"My computer is going very very ... FAST. IT Helpdesk joke"

"I told my girlfriend I could use a little pussy She said ""me too, mine's as big as a house."" Credit: Predator (1987)"

"My wife and I only smoke cigarettes after sex I've had the same pack since we were married but she's up to three packs a day! (Thanks, Rodney!)"

"What does non-alcoholic beer and going down on you cousin have in common? Sure they taste the same, but it just ain't right."

"What is an astronaut's favorite key on a computer keyboard? The space bar."

"Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me. Everyone I told swore they wouldn't tell anyone else."

"If you ever get attacked by a shark, don't forget to take a moment and appreciate the statistical improbability of it all."