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Joke of the Day

"PIGEON MAGICIAN: I want you to pick a car, any car...DONT TELL ME!. Ok [shits on windscreen] is THIS the car you chose?"

"Have you seen the prices of Almonds and Cashews? They're nuts."

"The bright side of global warming is that 100% of our great grandchildren will own beachfront property."

"Two Gay Men Walk Into A Bar One sits down, the other says ""Can I push your stool in?"""

"This time of year, I get sick of everyone writing an ""X"" instead of ""Christ"". I think it's time we all put the Christ back in Christ-box 360"

"The only things that defy gravity are women... ...the heavier they are, the easier they are to pick up."

"I think global warming is real because you hardly see The Penguin on episodes of Batman anymore"

"What do burnt pizza, frozen beer and a pregnant chick have in common? Some douchebag forgot to pull it out in time."

"People think having crabs is a bad thing. Still, at least something's sucking my cock."

"Blackhawks What is that player's name on the hawks that starts with Johnny. I think I know. Oduya?"