131474

Joke of the Day

"How easy is it to get stoned in Amsterdam? It's a piece of cake."

"Me: How are you feeling Grandpa? Grandpa: Oh you know with my hands mostly."

"Saw a guy with a barcode tattoo on his neck. Scanned it with my RedLaser app & he couldn't believe I found him cheaper on 3 online stores"

"This Valentines Day, I want to really surprise my wife. So I'm gonna introduce her to my girlfriend."

"How many Vietnam Vets does it take to screw in a lightbulb? YOU DON'T KNOW MAN!!!! YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!"

"My girlfriend has 206 bones in her body. 205, 204, 203, 202, 201... She'll make a great soup."

"Q: What did the blind German say? A: I can Nazi you!"

"I see ur bio says 'Medical Intern'. Can you take a look at this *sends DM of mother-in-laws face* n tell me if it's infected. It is right?"

"2 Mexicans got into a fight It was a Juan on Juan"

"Racism is like Nickelback... I like to joke about it, but I never want to see it live."