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Joke of the Day

"Q: Why don't women wear dresses in the winter? A: They could get chapped lips!"

"when i see lovers names carved in a tree... When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think its cute. I just think it's crazy how many people bring knives on a date."

"If we put aside our differences and work together, I truly believe we can come up with a few more alternate spellings of the name Britney."

"Sorry for nicking your car w/my door, but you didn't leave much room. It's small, but I circled it with my key so you could find it."

"Hey girl, are you made of lead? Because you have a plumbum."

"So a rabbi, a bishop, a black guy and a mathematician walk into a bar... ...the bartender looks at them and says ""What is this? Some kind of a joke?"""

"What does a pound, a dollar and rumble have in common? For a dollar you can get a pound of rubles."

"Why doesn't Mexico win Olympic Medals? Because all their best runners, jumpers, and swimmers are in America."

"What's every movie critic's favorite cooking ingredient? Michael Bay Leaves."

"*creating garbage cans* God: ""That's where trash goes"" *creating my twitter* God: ""That's where trash comes from"""