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Joke of the Day

"What's 2 + Blink 182 46"

"Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? They're trying not to attract any more undue blame then they already have."

"What is green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree might kill you? A pool table."

"I'm at my quickest when I try to follow someone out of the bathroom so I don't have to touch the handle."

"Why was the strawberry sad? Because her mother was in a jam."

"A guy says to the other... ""Marriage has taken all the joy out of sex."" ""How so?"" ""You know, there is always the terrifying chance of my wife coming home."""

"An atom is mugged by another atom... A bystander asks if he's OK. ""I think he got away with my favorite electron,"" he answered. ""Oh no! Are you sure?"" ""Yup, I'm positive."""

"Dwayne Johnson has said that he would run for President... As long as he isn't up against paper, then he should win."

"When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down."

"What's Brown and Sticky? A stick!"