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Joke of the Day

"I'm at my quickest when I try to follow someone out of the bathroom so I don't have to touch the handle."

"Ummm yeah I want one of those phone case's where I can put my credit cards in with my phone so when I lose my phone I'm also broke. Genius!"

"You really have to respect the male pornstars They're always working hard"

"Most girls: ""I hangout with guys, there's less drama."" Me: ""I hangout by myself. There's no drama & I don't have to wear pants."""

"Why do farts smell? ... For the benefit of the deaf!"

"No Grandma, an iPad is not a new brand of Maxi Pads"

"What's faster hot or cold? Hot! Because anyone can catch a cold! buh duh tsst"

"What did the homeless man get for christmas ? Hypothermia."

"What does a bunny do to a bank? Rabbit"

"When I was younger my dad showed me pictures of why to wear condoms during sex. The funny thing is, they were all pictures of me."