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Joke of the Day
"""Mommy mommy in school the kids call me shampoo"" ""Come on Johnson no more tears"""
Next Joke
"Me: your freezer went out I had to eat all the ice cream sandwiches Friend: it looks like someone kicked the outlet back into the drywall"
"Police Officer Joke Police officer: ""Can you identify yourself, sir?"" Driver pulls out his mirror and says: ""Yes, it's me."""
"Clever Commas If your Uncle Jack helped you get off an elephant, would you help your uncle, jack off an elephant."
"HER: why do you hate every single Hugh Grant movie? ME: i love love actually actually"
"My wife asked me to stop singing Wonderwall all the time... I said maybe"
"I know a guy who looks at so much porn on his phone- His apps are stuck together."
"Never buying anything home-made on eBay again... I bought an 'Irony Detector' off of eBay, but it was broken. It detected everything *but* irony..."
"Why did the console gamer cross the road? To render the buildings on the other side."
"""Bro check out that DILP."" ""Where? Wait what's a DILP?"" ""Dog I'd Like to Pet."""