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Joke of the Day

"I joined a poker tournament with a bunch of people who do origami. I'm gonna dominate, cause these guys always fold."

"My friend showed me her new vegan pants. I know vegans can be annoying and everything, but should we really be making pants out of them?"

"Deactivated my FB. Before the final ""submit"", they show you pictures of ""friends"" that says ""These people will miss you"". Best laugh ever."

"I was walking thru the graveyard the other morning... Saw a guy kneeling behind a headstone. I walked up to him and greeted him ""Morning!"" He replied, ""Nah, I'm just taking a shit"""

"Her: OMG! The holidays aren't an excuse to stuff your face with whatever edible that crosses your path. Me: I eat like this everyday."

"Did you know ""bathtub"" backwards is still ""bathtub""? It's not, but for a second there you believed me."

"You know those slices of American cheese you get from the supermarket? You're not going to be able to buy those anymore. Since Trump is going to make America grate again, apparently."

"I met a smelly man who had a way with words He was a pungent"

"do the Simpsons know they're all dying of jaundice"

"Who invented tap dancing? A father with six daughters and only one bathroom! :)"