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Joke of the Day

"A mormon checks into a hotel. On seeing there are video channels available in his room, he says ""I trust the porn is disabled."" The receptionist replies, ""No, it's just regular porn, you sicko!"""

"The scene where Indiana Jones swaps the bags and runs from a boulder but it's me trying to eat a cookie without my kid seeing me"

"The girl I met last week said she wanted a guy who was ""funny and spontaneous"" I showed up at her kitchen window late at night wearing a clown suit and suddenly it's all panic and screaming..."

"Trust is like an eraser. It gets smaller and smaller after every mistake."

"What do you call an unemployed Rastafarian? Jah bless."

"I wake up easy most of the time, but every now and then, I wake up hard."

"How do you explain a man birthing a baby? Taco bell for lunch"

"I thought you'd be flattered that my dog found your leg so attractive."

"[elementary school] BULLY: gimme your lunch money ME: no B: *grabs me by shirt* I said give it M: ok but this has to stop I'm your teacher"

"my life is a joke with no punchline"