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Joke of the Day

"I got stuck in a shop the other day... ... because when I went to walk outside there was a sign saying the street was closed."

"Did you hear what happened at the indian restaurant yesterday? Apparently it was a Naan event."

"I've got a friend who has got a butler whose left arm is missing Serves him right"

"A pakistani cabbie called me a racist I didn't say a word and left the cab. Because you don't negotiate with terrorists"

"Jerusalem by Don McLean I think the song could be greatly improved if at the line: ""All roads lead to you,"" the singer shakes a fist and yells out ""Take that, Rome!"""

"One of my lamps has a light bulb which has outlasted my past 7 relationships."

"Summing up my life in 5 words: 'I fail at maths'"

"What did Saddam Hussein and Little Miss Muffett have in common? They both had Kurds in their way!"

"What is a rapists favourite vegetable? Beat-root"

"My rubberband gun was confiscated in Algebra class It was a weapon of math disruption!"