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Joke of the Day

"Jerusalem by Don McLean I think the song could be greatly improved if at the line: ""All roads lead to you,"" the singer shakes a fist and yells out ""Take that, Rome!"""

"[god, creating ducks] Just like put a surfboard mouth on a big pigeon and make it like a loud idiot. I don't know"

"I live at the top of an 80 story building made of ihop pancakes and I pour burning hot maple syrup on anyone that tries to eat my home"

"What kind of cereal does Microsoft make? Wind O's"

"I remember when social networking was something that happened in person. How awkward."

"""Click to read this man's secret to incredible 6 pack abs!"" *click* article: hard work, diet, & exercise me: I have never felt more betrayed"

"""No! Don't go into the church! Nooo!"" ""Honey, what movie are you watching?"" ""Our wedding video."""

"Did you hear the one about the two gay Irish dudes? Patrick Fitzhenry and Henry Fitzpatrick"

"How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? Wanna go ride bikes?"

"The moon landing was staged and it was shot by Stanley Kubrick, the reason it looks so real is because of Kubrick's obsession with filming on location."