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Joke of the Day
"What is a rapists favourite vegetable? Beat-root"
Next Joke
"My hobbies include humming the Jurassic Park theme song to my chickens, to make them feel more in touch with their ancestors."
"Daddy? What is a tranny? Ask your mother. He knows."
"How does Kurt Cobain collect his thoughts? With a mop."
"For me, coming out as a teenager was the hardest thing I've experienced. God knows what it must have been like for my mother. Being in labour for that long."
"Friend: So, you are distantly related to the family next door, are you? Me: Yes, their dog is our dog's brother."
"I'm not saying you're a jackass but... You're the kind of guy who would buy Anne Frank a drum set."
"Why are defense lawyers the best lovers? Because they're great at getting you off."
"A morning text from me doesn't mean ""good morning"". It means ""I'm having very dirty thoughts about you right now""."
"People who unfollow me always seem startled when I show up at their home to conduct an exit interview"